Sunday, November 19, 2017


I'm afraid of change 
But I'm growing just the same
Trying to hold tightly
To the things that once defined me

But I'm panicking because it slips away
Each day
I'm somewhat different to the last
More parts are woken
More things are spoken 

I'm afraid I won't be able to relate 
To the girl I once was
And the loves in my life

I'm different from these people, always have been, but seeing it more now

Can feel it getting stronger

Wanting to explode away
From the monotony they
The routine.
The expect.

Same the same and the same again

Yes they'll always be home
But does home live in the past

Where is home for me now
On the road
In the unexpected

I miss them
For the friendship we used to have
For the times we were the same people

Just because we want different things out of life
Does that mean we're doomed for separation 

These people
Who once defined me
Helped me to write me

I'm not ready to let them go

But this passion and this drive
The thing that keeps me alive

The closer I move toward it
The further I am from them

The more I reject the norm
The more removed I become 

Would you rather be blind and lonely, lonely in your ideas, the things you think about, the conversations you know you need and have

Or awake and lonely.

Is it one or the other though?
I fucking hope not.

Live the life you lust.